If you have a loved one who suffers from severe anxiety or panic attacks, it can be easy to feel overwhelmed and frustrated. You know they are in a lot of pain, and struggle with aspects of life that you don’t quite understand. You want to help, but maybe you don’t know how to approach the situation. Here are 10 tips to help a loved one with anxiety.

1. Educate yourself. Knowledge is power, and this is certainly the case here. There are a number of different anxiety disorders including: panic disorder, social anxiety disorder, agoraphobia, obsessive compulsive disorder, and generalized anxiety disorder. Try to learn everything you can about your loved one’s type of anxiety. You can research hundreds of sites on the internet for information.

2. Support them by being a good listener. Sometimes your loved one will need a shoulder to cry on or someone to vent their frustrations to, especially after a severe panic attack or while going through an anxiety provoking situation.

3. Assure them. Tell them it’s not their fault they have anxiety. They are not weak, worthless, or mentally ill. Let them know you believe in them and have every confidence that they can get better.

4. Be patient with them. Anxiety doesn’t just happen overnight, and anxiety treatment can take time as well.

5. Get help. Anxious people are often ashamed of their feelings, but keeping it a secret is not healthy. Encourage your loved one to talk to a doctor or therapist or try an anxiety self help program. For a list of recommended anxiety self-help programs, click here.

6. Help yourself. Helping your loved one can take its toll on you and zap your energy. It is crucial that you remember to take good care of yourself with adequate rest, nutrition, and taking time out to do things you enjoy. Don’t let your loved one’s anxiety overtake your life.

7. Advocate for them. Put yourself in their shoes, try to learn what having anxiety really feels like, and appreciate the stigma of mental illness they are faced with out in the world.

8. Vent your frustrations appropriately. It’s okay and perfectly normal to feel upset, angry, frustrated. These are valid feelings in response to a very trying situation. Join a support group like families anonymous or an internet forum where you can vent your feelings to others who are in similar situations.

9. Don’t take it personally. Remember that an anxious person’s behavior is not indicative of who they really are. The anxious person has impaired social skills. If they are irritable or withdrawn, it’s because they feel bad about their anxiety. Remember it’s not about you, and it doesn’t mean they don’t love you.

10. Love them unconditionally. When they truly know you care, this is the best medicine of all.

Keep these tips in mind when you want to help a loved one with anxiety. As your loved one begins to get their anxiety under control, you can be their biggest champion. If you care about someone with anxiety, these are great ways to help.

Jill Green is a recovering anxious person who no longer lives in fear of her next panic attack. Life is beautiful! To learn more, or to start your own recovery from anxiety and panic today, visit her anxiety self-help blog.

Where to go from here:

• General Anxiety Defined
• Treatment for General Anxiety
• Overcome Anxiety and Stress Naturally
• Stressed and Anxious? 7 Tips for Busy Moms
• Hypnosis for Anxiety Disorders